Yep. Arrived at Bangok. I arrived here at night time, still quite tipsy from the parties in Krabi. We said goodbye with my brother at the airport where he continued his journeys back to home and I’m still gonna be here couple of days. I was in very high spirits and have to say that this has been the best New Year Celebration ever. We had so much fun! When it gets down to it, Thai people really know how to celebrate and have a party! I was very knackered when I arrived back to Cozy Bangkok Guest house last nigh, but now, after sleeping 12 hours in an A/C room I’m ready to thinking about my next plans again…at least to some extend.

I have to be careful where to go tho’. There have been big political riots in Bangkok lately so some areas of the city should not be entered at all. Apparently at least two people have died (if we believe what the government is saying) and 110 injured.  Well, I saw nothing when I arrived here last night, but even though the good night sleep I might just skip everything that involves lots of walking and sun and tourists. I might as well take a taxi (30BAHT) to the biggest shopping center called MBK and walk around in there.

MBK Center, Bangkok

I was there once already but the whole complex was SO huge that I was able to just browse through the first two floors and there was still 3 left! I thought that I might as well pamper myself a bit and decided to find a good hair salon and do something to this sun damaged pile of hemp that I have as a hair currently.

There are two contradicting things in my head. On the other hand I’m very keen on going home, but on the other hand it would be sooo cool to continue traveling. I was actually very surprised how much I enjoyed arriving back to Bangkok. The whole city felt completely different after seeing some of the other Thailand first.

I got to know so many amazing Thai people and understood more about their culture so after that Bangkok didn’t seem such a bad place anymore. Even tho’ arriving at night I was whistling the famous Thai reggae song (Too Ter Tam from Job2Do, check below!) out loud and greeting people in Thai and saying Happy New Year to everyone.

I was completely stress free, since I knew what kinda guest house I’m entering, where to find food, how is the city like and so on. The sense of familiarity with the city and the culture did the whole situation very very enjoyable. So all that made me wanna keep traveling. See more place, get the same familiar feeling with a new cultures. Enjoy the new people and share the experience with friends…and whistle some new songs.

But also, I think, it’s good to miss home. I even miss work. I miss my company and my own computer and laptop. I miss Photoshop, and the whole CS4 family:D I miss my work mates and my bosses. I even miss our clients:D I miss my family  and can’t wait to see my brothers son again and how he has grown up. I miss clean water, a good showers, a clean bed without any bugs. So actually, the familiar feeling what I had about Bangkok is actually the very same thing I miss about home.

And of course I miss J terribly. The whole trip has been such a challenge to our relationship and I think we are gonna see how has it been just after I arrive and we can talk face-to-face again. Share, relate, talk, compare, kiss, be close….to feel intimacy again. For now I do feel that we have survived very well. But like a good friend to me wrote “All good stories evolve after the journey” I think it is the same with relationships. All we have had to do is take it one day at a time. And all we can do now, when we finally meet again, is to take it a one day at a time.

When you are apart it is much more easier to keep an idealized picture of the other person in your mind. It feels good to miss him, it reminds me of how many things I love about him. But also, on the other hand, the even stronger love will emerge just after we have seen each other again. When we are able to re-forge the bond to be even stronger with not just words, but with each others presence. It reminds me of a natural cycle of breathing. There is inhale (taking in, experiencing, growing and absorbing) and exhaling (letting go, releasing, giving up and being thankful). This trip has been that to our relationship as well. First, for me, it has been an huge inhale. Taking everything in, feeling my independence, seeing the world, memorizing him. And now I feel like that exhale is already started. Where I’m letting go of the ideals, where I’m being thankful about everything that I’ve had, where I see all the things I’ve inhaled and release them back to their own places. Where I’m gonna be able to meet J again, and with the last oxygen pressure leaving me I can feel at peace with everything, see him as he is, be still. And start my new inhale again with him.

Both sides, inhale and exhale, even tho’ the other one is usually receiving and the other giving, are essential. Neither of them being bad – just natural cycles of everything. So it has been with my travels. Being apart, and being together again have not been either good or bad, just the natural flow of everything. The only thing what we can do, is to realize that every inhale and every exhale is different. So will our next inhale together be as well.

I think I am, and we are, gonna be just fine. <3